Let’s get the nasty out of the way:
*I’ll be back to explain why I haven’t posted in a long time
*this post has no pictures because sleep. Read it anyway.
25 The baptism of John, from where did it come? From heaven or from man?” And they discussed it among themselves, saying, “If we say, ‘From heaven,’ he will say to us, ‘Why then did you not believe him? ’ 26 But if we say, ‘From man,’ we are afraid of the crowd, for they all hold that John was a prophet.” 27 So they answered Jesus, “We do not know.”
It hit me all at once – we miss out because we lie to ourselves and thus to others in so many ways. But not only do we miss out on the richness (is that a word?) of life’s experiences by not stepping into and walking in truth, but we also miss out on the best God has for us- His perfect and pleasing will. This is yet another way by which we make our journeys more complicated; lessons that should take a short time go unlearnt for what can amount to years, with the attendant suffering, simply because instead of saying x or y we lie and deny the truths in our hearts and go with ‘I don’t know.’
As a parent, I’ve dealt with the frustration of ‘I don’t know’ from my child more times than I can count. As somebody’s child, I know all too well how frustrated and upset my mother used to get with me and my sisters when we answered ‘I don’t know, angazi’. 90% of the time that was a dishonest answer, but we were convinced that the real answer would land us or a sibling in even more trouble than the ever-annoying ‘I don’t know’. Examples right here, or a little anecdote even would be great, but honestly, with a newborn and one hour and twenty minutes left before her next feed, you’re just going to have to think of your own examples. Mama needs what sleep she can get!
All that to say this – speak your truth, at least to yourself even when it’s uncomfortable, because nothing good ever came from pretending to be less than you are. We were not created to live small lives. All that about being the head and not the tail, none of that is possible if instead of speaking out our truth we live in the valley of ‘I don’t know’.
This is big for me. I am definitely going to try and do better. No more living small for fear of upsetting or intimidating those around me. I am who I am and I know what I know. No more ‘I don’t knows’ unless, you know, I really don’t know.
I suppose you’re wondering what-all this has to do with the things of God? I’ll tell you. You will miss out on God’s best for you because you’re playing at ‘I don’t know’. Yeah, I said it. God doesn’t ‘understand’, remember? You making like you don’t know that that situation you’re in needs to change doesn’t mean God will play along and bless you in it, anyway. You know that that is sin, whatever your ‘that’ is, and I’m saying to you, go on and change, be ruthless about fleeing temptation, because honestly, you don’t know what BEST God has for you, if only you’ll let go of the mediocre and the passable.
We are called to be Christ-like. That is all.